Pets - some connections and memories.

Pets have more love and compassion in them than most humans. 

~Robert Wagner

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late at night. 

~Marie Corelli

Two different opinions yet convey the same meaning that  pets display and shower unconditional love. They bring so much joy in ones life. They end up becoming a part of your life, your better caring half.

I don't have any pet at the moment but we have had pets. My parents loved them and brother was so fond of them, I was kind of okay, liked them but I wasn't the one who could really take care and manage the puppies then, especially when they were very young. The puppies require the same attention as that of a little child.

The first pet we had was a white pomeranian. We brought her home when she was just a couple of weeks old. She was fond of my mother, mom took care of her like a little baby, feeding her with the feeding bottles, bathing her, comforting her and making her grow from this tiny little thing into a handsome pup.We called her Ginny. Once mom was going out, I was in the 10th grade then. Ginny was still a little pup. She told me everything that I had to do. The first chore was to feed Ginny, I was to give her some milk. I did that but didn't take a note that the milk was hot. Offered it to her, she took a sip from that and shrieked, it was such a painful cry. She left the milk and walked away immediately, giving me one dirty look. I didn't realise what went wrong . Then on, Ginny would never have anything that I gave her. 

When Ginny was about an year old we got a little labrador we named him Dash. It was black and the coat was shiny. Mom gave Dash the same love and care as Ginny. Dash and Ginny bonded well and started growing up together. 

We had fights among us siblings but the pups were well behaved. Looks like they listened to mom more than we did and they didn't do anything that she'd disapprove.

They were all grown up and formed a pretty picture. Loved my mom and were fond of dad. They had a coordial relation with me and never interfered. Probably Ginny had communicated my inefficiencies to Dash and must have told him to keep me at an arms length. Ginny also knew exactly how dad's scooter sounded and would rush to the gate when he got back home from office. 

I left home and came to Mumbai for my graduation, I guess Ginny must've been thrilled to get the bitch out of her way... anyway as I said we shared a coordial relation. I would see them only once in 6 months that too for just two weeks. But being away from home made my heart grow fonder of this black and while pair, I guess distance did the trick on them as well. During my second year vacation, I was home for nearly two months. I used to take them for walks. Yes I was in college and third year meant being prepared for the campus interviews; fitness and looking my best also was a part of it. In this pursuit the two of them also became involved. Ginny didn't like waking up at 5 am and giving me company for walks. She pretended to be fast asleep just when I would get ready for walk, she gave up just in 3 days flat. But Dash being the adventurous one and I guess being protective about me came along. He loved those walks. Somehow the two months flew by and I came back to Mumbai. Putting Dash into a good fitness mode. He continued getting up at 5 am, would then go into my brothers room and lick his face if he didn't wake up on time. Somehow spared my sister. She was the little princess in the house and Dash knew it well. But brother had to take him out for walks everyday. Brother got quite irritated with the whole drama at home and when we met next he narrated all the morning walks saga, we still talk about them and have a good laugh.

Dash and Ginny lived with us for about 10 years, then dad got transferred to another city and we had to move there. Since we were going to be living in  an apartment in a high rise building, we decided against taking  the pets with us. So we had to look for secure homes for both of them. Dash was sent to dad's colleague's house, the lady was extremely fond of pets and Dash had company. We heard that he didn't eat for a couple of days but eventually the lady got him on track and he was fine. I am sure he missed my parents a lot,just the way they missed him. Mom cried often.

Ginny on the other hand went to my aunt's house. They are vegetarians so she had to deal with a lot of vegetarian food but aunt did give regular non vegetarian treats to her. She was stronger and adjusted into her new home well. We saw both the pets settling in and we shifted base too.

We came to Mumbai and started living in an apartment. Brother wanted to get another pet home. I didn't like the idea as everyone loved the pets but mom had to take care of the logistics part and going out or out of station required huge planning. Told my brother that he could think of having pets in the house only after he got married and  managing the pet would be his and his better half's responsibility. 

He got a Dalmatian puppy home one day. Parents were out of station and I had started working. My little sister was home on study leave. She took care of the pet, I was amazed at the way she was looking after it. It wasn't trained on anything and we weren't trained on taking care of it either. I wasn't good at it anyway! It would shit all over the place and my poor sister would be on a cleaning spree. She was someone who didn't even step on the wet soil while walking in the rain and I couldn't see her doing all that. Gave an ultimatum to our brother that the pup had to go, he needed to find another home and people who were better equipped to handle him. The puppy was really cute but somehow we couldn't keep it, was getting it very difficult for my sister and I couldn't see that. Brother found some people in Kolkata who wanted the pet so it went there by flight. Yes we missed it and I kept wondering whether we did the right thing by sending it away. But parents were out and we couldn't handle it. Managing ourselves was a huge task in itself! then the news came of Ginny dying of old age, we all missed her and felt the void of losing someone dear. 

This post is written for http://indiblogeshwaris.com/2013/09/that-tuesday-thingy-pet-peeves/

pictures have been taken from google with due credits.

Shopping ....virtually!

As kids we'd go to the local bania for grocery shopping and when it came to clothes would visit the market place with parents. That market place would be quite a drive away. The trips would be a few and far between. The first one would be when the school reopened shopping for the uniforms ,rain gear and books, the second one generally would be around Diwali time and of course the third trip would be for the birthday depending on when it fell. These are the first memories of my shopping.

Mom would tell us that during her childhood days they hardly went to any such outings. Infact they'd have the tailor called over to their place, who'd stay put for months together stitching clothes for the entire family, a large joint family in the village having about 30 - 40 members. As for the grocery, they'd have most of it produced right there in their fields and for other things the elder men in the family would do the purchase from the town every quarter or may be just twice a year.

My generation now prefers shopping at malls. In fact the online shopping is picking up too. The advantage being that one can check out products, do window shopping and choose products right from the comforts of one's home. No need to step out and do a hurried shopping, no tension of finding parking space and ofcourse worry about kids running here and there and increasing your shopping bill with absolutely everything they can get their hands on, lets call it play zone and then the food court. 

I don't shop much online, as I think one needs to feel the fabric while purchasing  garments. Other things are fine. At times one ends up getting good deals and combo offers that are irresistible.One may miss this at a store but on the computer, while shopping online the information is conveyed logically and in a such a way that it can't be missed.

It makes me think how will shopping be.... say 15 years on?

Of course most of the shopping will be online. As it was said, being 'born with a silver spoon'... forget spoon the children now are born with the cell phones. I still can't figure out the Angry birds but my children are Pro at them. Take any game on the cellphone, there are hundreds of them coming out each day and kids pick them up so fast. In fact game developer has become a lucrative career. 20 years from now will be the time of these kids who may be professionals and some of them may be new parents. I am imagining them shopping. I am sure most of it would be online and they'd step out only for outings, trekking and may be on a holiday but never for grocery shopping or any other shopping for that matter. By then the comfort and trust will be a lot more on the online transactions. My generation too is getting on track and prepared with the online shopping. Infact some of my friends and collegues already are into it big time!.... and they are happy.

Will there be a need for the stores at all?  It'll be minimal, for that matter malls may have kiosks of the different brands where the shopper makes a virtual cart and selects items from the list makes payments and signs off from the kiosk. When he is home the order is delivered at his doorstep. Stores won't require to maintain large shops instead have little kiosks with a person to guide the shopper with the purchases. The shopper need not even bother with carrying the stuff back home with him. It'll all be delivered at his doorstep. The situation will be win win as the stores need not have such a huge workforce. There won't be the need to store and stack the merchandise in the premier showroom. Most of it can be in the go downs and warehouses elsewhere. Our children, the young professionals then can enjoy playing their temple runs and angry birds or even the falmville. When farming can be done online shopping is certainly a cakewalk! They'll love their online shopping.

Companies can save on their brand ambassadors, shop spaces, work force and so on. But they might have to use some freebies in the form of  new online games that the shoppers will be game for.

So won't see the vegetables, fruits or any other thing physically but will have the pictures of them taken on a real good camera with high pixels. Easier for everyone to select from the list and put in their carts, payments would be through credit cards. Imagine not going to a messy bhaaji market or the smelly fish market and haggling the rates with the Moushis...

Shopping, and how?....ofcourse online!

This post has been written for The future of shopping on indiblogger in association with eBay.

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The pictures have been taken from Google from different websites with due credit to each one of them.

A bond of love called Rakshabandhan...

This full moon day our hearts are in brim

Feeling of faith and serenity in mind.

We light the lamps and our hears glow

Radiance of happiness and peace are in flow.

Harmonious homes are like streams of joy

Flowing and flourishing the landscape en route.

Nobility in heart and character in deed

Righteous homes alone make a beautiful State.

Sisters will tie the thread on the brothers

Abiding them to do only what is right and clean.

Put the Kumkum and blessed rice on the head

Where will dwell right thoughts and noble action. 

                                    by A.P.J.Abdul Kalam

Its that time of the year again when we four meet, my younger brother, sister and our Big bhaiya. Thankfully we have been able to keep up with the tradition. Met them with their families this Rakshabandhan day. 

Its another walk down the memory lane. Its almost like reliving our childhood. Some things have changed and some are still the same. Changes are in the type of Rakhis and our bond of love is certainly the same, we pull each other's leg, laugh a lot and have a great time together. As far as Rakhis are concerned, those days colourful big Rakhis were a craze. I remember our brother would want us sisters to get him the biggest Rakhi. Probably he must have been around 10  years old then. Those Rakhis were made of sponge... layers of it and they were huge. They would be atleast 3- 4 tiers, had 'Mere Bhaiya' written on them and the boys loved sporting them. This was way back in the 1980s! Then as we grew up he didn't like the big Rakhis, wanted us to get the smaller and more sleek ones. That had beautiful messages on them.  When he was in college, he would insist on the still smaller versions of the sacred thread symbol of  love between brothers and sisters.

After he started working, he'd like just the fine, really neat thread  so that he could wear it on his wrist all year long. In fact its difficult to get such rakhis in the market now, so most of the time my sister ends up making them with sillk threads, We tie two Rakhis each one is a decorative one and the other being a plain thread, that our brother can wear all through the year. Its a tradition that our brother replaces his old Rakhis with the new ones every Rakhsbandhan day.

I also share a very special bond with my cousins, they are 3 brothers. I have been sending them Rakhis by post  as they stay in another state. Over the years the only time I write a letter in Hindi and post it along with the Rakhis is for them. Its a yearly ritual that I follow. Now all three of them are married and have kids, the number of Rakhis that I sent also has gone up with the arrival of my nephews. My aunt and uncle also make the customary call every Rakshabandhan day. That call is also very significant in our lives now. We spoke just last evening.

This festival reminds us that the bond of love between brother and sister is unique. Has the bitter sweet memories of childhood and the growing up years. One finds the first best friend in one's sibling. A friend for life. 

Thinking of my brothers and sister; sending them lots of love and best wishes.....

Written for http://indiblogeshwaris.com/2013/08/that-tuesday-thingy-brothers-and-sisters/

Images have been taken from google, with due credits

Is being a girl a crime.... a curse for the family?

I was watching a short film by Evan Grae Davis titled "It's a girl". According to him these are the 3 deadliest words in the world. He reinforces what I know just like millions of  women around the globe. Also, he talks about what women face in today's liberalised, privatised and globalised world. Oh, we have made moon almost our second home. We are reaching out to the other planets to find if life is possible there. In fact women, women of Indian origin have captained some of these projects. This is reality, there's reality of another kind too, the reality of female infanticide, gendercide and violence against women. 

A woman faces this violence right from the time she is in her mother's womb in the form of Female infanticide . Gendercide is a major concern in countries like China and India. The male to female ratio is as low as 120:100. Evan Grae Davis is a film maker and has been travelling around the world. He knows many unbelievable facts and has statistics to support them. He talks about a woman in South India who was married off to her brother in law as her sister could not bear a male child. She in turn had girl child one after the other. She killed the child right after her birth and did this 8 times. She showed the small heaps of soil where she had buried her children in the field close to her house. She had no emotions forget showing any regret while talking about the issue. But she touches us with the harsh reality of a woman's life especially in developing countries and among the less privilege. She says that she did not want her children to have a life like her own. Davis says that this story moved him the most, he felt shock and hurt. 

According to UN, Violence Against Women is a huge public health issue and a violation of human rights. It results in a wide range of physical, mental, sexual and reproductive health issues for both men and women, compounded by women who are afraid to report the violence she faces. With little access to healthcare, education and opportunity, many women are left open to abuse.Up to one in three women experience physical or sexual violence in their lives.Violence against women is all about power. It is the attempted domination over her life by her abuser.Violence against women is NOT a private or family issue. It is a community and public health issue affecting not only the abuser and his victim but everyone around them.

Affluent societies also have their issues pertaining  to women. There still is inequality in almost every field. Closer home, in India we have to deal with monsters such as the female infanticide, dowry and its evils. They are the topmost concerns both for the government and the society. There have been stringent laws against the two but that too look just drops in the ocean. Female infanticide is prevalent in some states so the government has made it illegal to determine the sex of the foetus. Our girls are still being killed for dowry. Yes we have progressed but whats the use when we still have this stigma attached to us. Our women don't feel safe in our cities or villages. Don't they deserve the little pleasures in life. Pleasure of living without fear, of having hopes and nurturing dreams or are the dreams, hopes and right to make choices meant just for the privileged? Is it a crime to be born as a girl? I have no answers to this... do you?

This takes me back to my own life. I was born  pre mature  at just 7 months. My mother nursed me (literally) to good health. My family did everything possible to keep me alive. Mom was very young at that time; she always believed in me, her first child and had enormous faith and hope. She says that at One, I was one of the healthiest looking child around. Coming from this background  it amazes me to hear about such brutalities to little girls and the violence that women face.

A girl deserves the right to live, a right to live without fear and to soar in the sky like the falcon.... Can we give her that. Or is it asking for too much!

Give her the wings so she can fly

Give her the hope so she can dream

Give her the chance so she can give you the future

Remember she is the mother of the generations to come

                           link to the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeSYN2c8f_A

This post is written for the Idea Caravan and Indiblogger in association with Franklin Templeton Investments. Franklin Templeton Investments partnered the TEDxGateway Mumbai in December 2012.